Firehose #157: Summer Means (American) Fun

Also: Moynihan interviews some kind of turtle?

How goes progress on Fixing America by Visiting America? We did our level best Saturday (after a requisite two-hour drive through American-flag territory) on a certain exclusive island compound, huffing BBQ and mini-hot dogs, taking in some dazzling live electric blues, and drinking seasonably appropriate adult beverages. Quite a few Fifth listeners in attendance, many probing questions and elusive answers…. Please post Americana updates in the Comments and Chat!

* Speaking of the Chat, Fanimator in Chief Arch Stanton is at it again:

* Enough with the frivolities! Here’s serious journalist Michael Moynihan interviewing (*checks notes*) Turtleboy, who is an obsessive about the Karen Read trial, whatever that is. A “10/10” interview, sayeth commenter Evan Besser:

* The Report this week also featured a convo with Seth Harp, author of the new The Fort Bragg Cartel: Drug Trafficking and Murder in the Special Forces.

* I wrote a Reason piece this week that emanated from an early-Trump-2.0 episode we did here, during which I questioned whether the president’s energetic use of executive orders and suchlike was actually pretty comparable to his immediate predecessor. Well, people count such things, and the answer is in the headline – “Forget Obama: Trump's Pen and Phone Are Bigger Even Than FDR's.” Here’s the top:

On Monday, President Donald Trump signed executive orders federalizing law enforcement in the District of Columbia and lengthening the suspension of threatened tariffs on China by three months. They were the 187th and 188th executive orders of Trump's second term, on just its 203rd day.

That's more executive orders than predecessor Joe Biden issued in his entire presidency, 162. It's also more than George H.W. Bush (166), Gerald Ford (169), and 24 of the first 25 presidents. (Ulysses S. Grant, with his 217 over eight years, will likely be eclipsed by Trump's 2025 totals this fall.) Neither the famously power-expanding George W. Bush, nor Barack Obama of the notorious "pen and phone," signed as many as 188 executive orders in any of their combined four terms.

The only American president to compete with the size of Trump's second-term pen was the man whose energetic aggrandizement of the executive branch inspired generations of conservative and libertarian opposition: Franklin Delano Roosevelt. That a MAGA Republican is competing on process with the ultimate progressive Democrat is an indicator of just how radically Trump has reshaped the ideology of the GOP.

* Kmele this week appeared on an episode of The Middle with Jeremy Hobson, discussing with fellow guest Cornel West whether Americans are “afraid to speak [their] mind[s] in the current social and political climate.”

* Important male grooming update:

Yep, that’s a recent pic of our old pal and fellow cocktail-enjoyer Peter Meijer, veteran of Special Dispatch #51, #307, #339, #367, #424, and Members Only #184. When contacted for comment, the former congressman and always-ginger replied, “I don’t know how or whether I can stop.” I speak for all of Fifdom when I say DON’T YOU DARE.

* We talked on M.O. 271 about the awful Foreign Account Tax Compliance Act (FATCA), and how it has brutalized the banking options for the 8 million or so Americans who live abroad. Here’s a sampling of my writing on the subject: “Stupid New Washington Law Blocks Americans From Opening Bank Accounts Abroad” (2011), “The Dark Side of Anti-‘Swiss Bank Account’ Politics” (2012), “American Who Renounced Citizenship: ‘My bank down the street is not an offshore account'” (2013), “Kiss Your Financial Privacy Goodbye” (2014), “FATCA Victim, on Renouncing Citizenship: 'It was a gut wrenching experience that I do not think I will ever be over'” (2015), “Things You Should Consider Before Moving to Canada” (2016), “Americans Keep Setting New Records for Renouncing Citizenship” (2017).

* In #519 (I think it was), Moynihan talked about an insane documentary called The Dancing Outlaw. You can watch it right here:

This led multiple listeners to recommend a follow-up, called The Wild and Wonderful Whites of West Virginia. Trailer:

* Did I mention before that there’s an unofficial (I think?) database of transcribed Fifth Column episodes, at https://fifth.rocks? Well, now you know! Tell us what you find….

* Oh right, we were talking about the solution to America’s problems being more Americans driving through America talking to Americans. Well, to be honest, that idea originated from Nancy Rommelmann (#79, S.D. #27, S.D. #30, #198, #203, S.D. #34, S.D. #50, S.D. #64, S.D. #111), who expanded on the idea this week in a Busty Wimsatt-culled Twitter clip that I can’t embed because of stupid corporate fights, and also on this longer convo w/ Ethan Strauss (#185, #333, #383, M.O. #151, #408). TL;DR: "Here’s the solution. Every American needs to get in their car, and drive 1,500 miles, and talk to five Americans a day…. And then you come back, and you tell me that you hate your fellow Americans. Because you’re not going to be able to do it.”

* Comment of the Week comes from Chris:

If it improves Billy Joel's image in Moynihan's eyes at all.. every single time I encountered the guy, he had some twenty-something year old stunner on his arm. He also made an impromptu appearance at a local Bayville fundraiser one year and just got up on stage with the hired act and performed Bob Dylan covers. Thought that was pretty cool of him.

And Kmele, as a longtime guitarist, the best advice I can give is to first learn a simple 3 or 4 chord song that you absolutely love. Once you realize that you too can play these songs you'll never wanna put it down. Then go with Matt and Michael to see Nick Cassarino play with the Olive Tree Madmen. Honestly one of the most talented guitarists I've ever seen. And I've seen many.

*

The internet comes through yet again. Video evidence of the Billy Joel appearance:

Walkoff, pre-dating my birth, comes from a man I knew not before yesterday, but then enjoyed in all his 82 goddamned years of glory.